Our Final Days

hey frnds its the same day of the year.....finally its here...this 1 year took years to pass away
... specially considering the last 4 years of our life which still seems like a short dream..which came to our eyes....gave us so many sweet and unforgettable memories...and went away wid a blink...not that m writing all this to revive those memories...i just cant do that...coz m still not out of those special times....and it still seems like everything is same....and next morning i will have to get up...see my watch and curse those coll authorities for these early timings of classes and bunk it again. But those images r still etched in my mind which i never ever thought i will be a part of ... times which i wanna go back to again and again......may be have this small desire of even changing them or may be stopping the time thr itself so that we never had to be a part of them ever...but unfortunately its they say is a part of life ........ We all have to bear this pain of separation...just writing this piece to rem all of u special ppl who r an indispensable part of my life now.....

12th of may 08

well the first time this feeling hit me wen it was time for pooja to leave us forever for her home on 12th may...whole day it was quite normal for us....but u realize it wen u go thru it...that slight tint of even looking at the smallest of things around u....just coz u wont ever be able to see them or be wid them ..bring loads of different emotions in u at the same time ........we really felt it wen in the evening as usual we went to our fav raba bhai(even visits to his shop were counted now)
...... saw nirmal thr...just too lost in himself and not uttering a word even...we knew y he was like that...and tried to cheer him up in our own ways....but it wasnt that easy considering the pain of ur close 1s leavign u forver... nothing can take their place ever .....he had many things to say to ppl who r leaving....and we never wanted him to live all his life wid a guilt that he kept things
inside him forever and never took them out...we were glad he finally did .. watever way it turned out to be...but the amount of tears that came out of his eyes after she left told everything.....we all were thr at the station to drop her...she had tears in her eyes every now and then
.... and wid it i got the feel of how it gonna be wen i willl actually leave all dese ppl who r everything for me now...she was trying to smile in dese circumstances too but tears just restricted them....finally her train came and she left us all ..... and we kept looking at her till we lost the sight of train.

Nirmal was again back to his norm after shedding loads of tears but was quiet again...it was more than 11:30 already.and all the attention now shifted to abhinav's bthday....we all decided to go to ccd to celebrate it...and thru it may be relax a bit after so much of unprecendented circumstances....we sat thr outside the ccd....brought cake for him...and celebrated his last bthday wid us together....then till late night every1 was just reviving those old memories of how we came to coll and whr and how we met each other for the 1st time...we stayed thr and kept toking for long...and then came back wid 1 person not thr wid us...and slowly but
surely we gonna lose every1 in a span of 2-3 days.

13th of may 08

it was a new day...may be the last morning in hostel for few of us....we all decided to cut abhinav's bthday cake in mayfair....we all went thr and brought a yummy cake for him
.... probably he was the luckiest among us to have got this opportunity to celebrate his bthday wid all of us .. probably for the last time coz we never know whr this tide of luck will take all of us....in all this celebration we got the surprise of our lives wen tyagi gifted us wid the symbol of our 4 years of frndship and special relationship ...covering it all in a sweet video featuring all our special moments wid her special comments on them..we saw that video together .... and those 5 mins were a mix of several emotions...we laughed together...cracked jokes on each other
seeing some slides....and at tyms got very emotional too wid the way some slide touched us.At the end of those 5 mins every1 was quiet for sometime.....as we made a long journey of 4 years in that 5 mins video made by tyagi ..some of us were smiling...some had tears in their eyes...for me it was like time has to be stopped here coz it wont ever come back.
thanx to tyagi who didnt sleep whole night to make this thing possible and she let us see our own life in this coll for 4 years through her eyes.

it was time for richa to go...the koolest 1 of us .... but in these tyms even the most stable 1 r hit on a major scale.....and even she was no exception...she had her train in the
morning itself.....and considering the long list of frnds she made here........every1 just lined up at the station...to bid gudbye to this bindaas gal who has smiled always and made others smile.....but this day it was a different scenario altogether...that unique smile and voice of her was missing and a tinge of tension covered her face....and so was on the faces of every1
who were thr to give her a last hug which gonna stay wid her forever....she met every1...specially sandy who left his date wid a gal to rush to station to meet her and he did everything so fast that in a blink he was gone too..then she toked to every1 and was quiet
bubly till then as she always is....but the moment train arrived....its really very difficult in words to describe her ... it all changed....and she was crying like hell....she refused to go inside even though the signal was made...train finally left but not her tears and she held her body and hands outside the gate....and kept waving at us.......at this particualr moment for the first
time in 4 years i saw 1 guy broke down and lost his kool and started running towards to the train in a desperate attempt to either stop the train or not let richa go or may be not let the sight of her go away frm his yes...never seen karan break down like that..kannu kept waving at her till we lost sight of her and even richa did so till the very last moment...

we didnt get much tym to get over this ... as we had to rush down to hostel as jadu was leaving in 2 hrs...some of us went to have lunch and me ,jadu and nirmal went back to hostel to get jadu's luggage....nirmal all the way kept repeating abt the things of last nite....we came back to station which had become our new home till then...jadu was as kool as ever...though too subdued by his own standards .... obviously the situation has taken its toll on every1...we were joking around while waiting for his train to come...got so many stills too ... after some time train arived....we all went inside to his seat and sat thr....for the last time we all started singing for jadu ..... and typical jadu song it was....yaa u guessed it right....." SUTTA NAA MILAA" .....time to bid gudbyee to him as his train was abt to leave....every1 hugged him and said last few words to him .... wid tyagi making the situation light by telling him to get a "deo"....in the blink of a second we lost 1 more of our frnds .... for a long long time....knowing things wont be same ever again.

we all returned back...to our hostel..had to write many cds...containing all the pics of our special moments in last 4 years..after some time it was abhinav's turn to leave as his car was waiting outside...my rumy for 4 years...i was gonna feel more coz he was the part of everything we saw and faced in coll...going back to rum and seeing 1 empty bed was enuf to tell me that
its was all coming to an end....his car was waiting outside the allahadbad bank's atm...last rituals had to be made...and this time he lost his self control too...loads of tears flowing out under his specs and all of us trying to comfort him thru our hugs...he got inside the car .. waved at us at the last moment....and just 10 mins after he left....we all at the same moment got a very touchy msg frm him in our cells....that made us feel that though he has left....but all those memories wont.

Shaam me it was moti who had to leave us....this 1 gal who starts shedding tears in the slightest of tensions.....had been crying non stop for last 3 days seeing her closest frnds leave her 1 by 1.....really gave a big shock to all of us left there by not shedding even a bit of tear....may be till then she had her eyes so dried up that she wanted to leave on a good note...with that
ever smiling face of her.....and may be we rem her wid that smile only.

14th of may 08


it was all for the day...most of us has left us...came to my rum finally wid a heavy heart.....my both rumies had left .... it was silence all around...felt hollow from inside...it was my last night thr...had to leave this place tomm morning early at 5 o clock...the same place whr i have had all the fun and masti for last 3 years...now felt like a calm and a haunted 1 whose dead silence was killing me....in the evening only i told tyagi to meet me anyhow ... though i knew it will be really difficult for her to come down....considering the xtra rules that these hostel ppl put on them.i packed everything and tried to go to sleep .....cudnt switch off the light or i was sure i wont be able to sleep....i was loaded will hell lot of thoughts ... wat life will be without these very ppl wid whom i have shared erything....till 3 i barely had had any sleep...got up at 4 somehow...called every1 to wake them up...wanted every1 to be thr .... was shocked to see tyagi calling herself...and later got to know she didnt sleep whole nite just to keep her words and meet me in the morning...finally every1 came up....i left rum and gave a final glance to this special place...looked at everything for the last time and said gudbyee to them.........i first went to girls hostel...was sad that she wont be able to come to station...but somehow she managed to come down thr to the gate...saw her and cudnt control myself..though she kept saying not to cry...wont ever forget that final hug thru those door grills...bid gudbye to her and left for station .....every1s eyes were damn sleepy...was feeling bad for them as y i had taken such a early morning train...but had no choice..it was time to say my final words to every1 ... nirmal ... told him to get over all wat happened ...... sandy....told him wid whom i will play tt and cricket .... kannu...told him wid whom i will have all the fun time in class....finally had to get up on train..cudnt let them go out of my sight...but finally they did....but still kept standing alone on the gate for a long time....thinking whom i will miss the most....and the ans that came fom within was each of u ... but the moment i sat down...got a call frm tyagi...and i was bak to normal again !!!

15th of may 08


At home i was in constant touch wid every1...next day it was tyagi's turned to leave...and after knowing wat happened at that time really made me feel for her ... she was just not ready to go inside the airport and kept crying.....she was the 1 who came all the way frm delhi to study in bbsr which is just too far away frm her place...this place which was so alien to her became so special at the end of 4 years that she just refused to leave ... her soul was still thr and she gave everything in her to that special video that she made....still rem wen i met her in delhi and saw the video in her car again...and she still had her eyes soken....she went inside the plane and sill kept crying very badly that ppl around her even noticed it...she was going far
frm us distancewise.....but the attacement inside our hearts will always be thr....In the night nirmal and nikhil had to leave....i cud easily understand wat must they be going through...seeing each one of us leaving in front of their eyes...they had just sandy wid them to see them off to station...sandy still staying thr for some obvious reasons .... i toked to them and both nirmal and nikhil sounded very low...told them that we all will meet in the future soon...... sandy was obviously too tensed abt being alone thr....but even he was trying his best to have smthing he loved the most ... and stayed in hostel for many days though he wasnt allowed to...At last he was the last person to say byee to our sweet hostel..


So this was the way how things went for 3 days ..... and for most of the time we found ourselves sulking in those flood of emotions which took us by storm and left us alone and totally disillusioned.But the fact is the thing which makes me happy and strengthens me is the unity and togetherness that we still have towards each other ... whichever part of country we may be in.Thnx to u people that m still alive and going strong watever problem comes in coz i know u ppl will always be thr wid me and each other...LOVE U ALL !!